11.02.2004
University is honestly filled with so many highs and lows... to bad the highs and lows seem to hit me quick and with great extremes. I can't even say the workload is too bad cuz honestly I think i did more work in high school with my extra curriculars how pathetic is that?
Well either way my marks are still all over the place and i've determined studying does me jack all. Halloween was interesting did something dumb with some dude in a french maid costume shoot me please. Also met some tall dude named Josh he was very tall. partying is starting to get tiring and much to expensive for my budget I believe, i don't know its just not fit into what i normally do. I find myself drifting away from old friends and just making myself a nice new facade to act behind. Its tiring.
Going home this weekend and by home i mean uoft thank you soooooo much david for letting me crash your place I am just not ready to face home, not just yet. Anyways i should be studying psychology but listening to emo music has pushed me into a lull and another down point in life. Maybe posting will prevent me from bringing out that comforting little razor blade... just maybe eh?
Bren thanks tons for trying to help but there are times I think I'm a lost cause...or just seeking attention and honestly neither seem to be an appealing aspect to me. Well whatever god knows no one reads this so thank the lord for that one. I don't miss home, but I don't like it here. i'm just soooooo tired, sleep is nice.
Time to slowly slide into a new persona but whatever I found another song I like so I'm going to post the lyrics in here again.... mmm Dashboard Confessional how i love you
Dashboard Confessional - Carve your heart out yourself
Carve your heart out yourself
Hopelessness is your cell
Since you've drawn out these lines
Are you protected from trying times?
Man it takes a silly girl to lie about the dreams she has
Lord it takes a lonely one to wish that she had never dreamt at all
Oh look now, there you go with hope again
Oh, you're so sure I'll be leaving in the end
Dig a ditch deep enough
To keep you clear of the sun
You've been burned more than once
You don't think much of trust
Man it takes a silly girl to lie about the dreams she has
Lord it takes a lonely one to wish that she had never dreamt at all
Oh look now, there you go with hope again
But I'll be sure your secret is safe with me
Oh, you're so sure I'll be leaving in the end
Treating me like I'm already gone
But I'm not, I will stay where you are always
I will stay, I will stay, I will stay (all of now)
[repeat to fade out]
# posted by Diana: 3:54 p.m. |